While this is a prank, I think we’ve all be in real situations that were pretty close to this.
Twitter with me @uniambic
I’ll be reading at Fergie’s Pub (1214 Sansom St) in Philadelphia next week with Sean Webb and Michelle Castleberry. All the details in the picture below and here. It’s a fun spot so I hope to see lots of people.
Sunday May 4th 2014, 2PM. Writers with Broadkill River Press (and that includes me) will be at The Writer’s Center in Bethesday MD.
Grant Clauser (that’s me)
Reading their poetry (brief open to follow)
Sunday March 16, 2014
6 PM to 7:30 PM
Good Karma Café
928 Pine St. Philadelphia PA
On February 1 at Musehouse in Philadelphia Hayden Saunier and I will be reading from our new books. You should go. There will be snacks and wine. And poems too. And books for sale. And people to talk to.
Last weekend I went to see three Philadelphia-influenced poets read at the Manayunk Arts Center.
Here are selections from that evening.
David Livewell’s new book is Shackamaxon.
Pete Krock read from his book Looking for an Eye.
Joe Chelius has two chapbooks, Row House Yards and Taking Pitches from Pudding House Press.
When writing, I keep to a handful of rules, something to guide my work, like a handrail on a woods trail. I also have a tendency to change my rules when they no longer suite me. Here are today’s, which may be different from tomorrow’s:
- Don’t be boring. This is a big deal for me, but I assume I don’t live up to it on many occasions. I attend a fair amount of poetry readings and read a couple hours worth of poetry almost every day, so I know something about boring poems. Subject matter can be boring, language can be boring, titles can be boring. Today I’ll try use a lot of “t”s in my poems, because I think “t” is an unboring letter. We had a big storm earlier this week, you may have heard of it. Storms are not boring. The opposite of boring isn’t interesting, it’s just unboring. Mysterious, engaging, sympathetic, sentimental, dangerous, threatening, disturbing… are all unboring.
- Be trustworthy. A poem is an invitation to the reader—you want the reader to enter your world, point-of-view, sick mind or private delirium. If you don’t create a sense of trust, the reader won’t be engaged.
- Have a reader in mind. My first reader is my imaginary friend, and he’s a lot like me (but thinner and with more money and friends). Keeping a reader in mind leads to writing that is more trustworthy and has a clearer voice. Voice is purpose, and purpose implies audience. If you shout “piss off” into the air, it just floats away without purpose. If you shout “piss off” at your boss, it has purpose and voice. It also gets you fired, so have a backup plan for that.
- Always be nice to dogs.
- Don’t fear sentimentality. I’m a sap. I watch “It’s a Wonderful Life” every December and will until my eyes are donated to science. People love that movie because they’re spineless and easily moved (me too). Work with it.
- Don’t try to teach something. You’ll be annoying, and people will think you think you’re smarter than them. Try to learn something instead. I believe poems, the good ones, are not for expressing something; they’re for sorting something(s) out.
- Shoot for clarity, but figure you’ll miss a good part of the time. When I’m fly fishing, I always have a spot on the water I try to hit with my casts. I usually miss, but often still catch fish. I also get snagged in a lot of trees. That’s the difference between almost clarity and complete abandonment.
- Sleep experts tell us that even complex dreams only last seconds—so poems shouldn’t be long.
- Don’t write dream poems. They’re boring, unless Richard Hugo is writing them, and since he isn’t writing them anymore, neither should you. Fiction writer Tana French agrees with me.
- If all else fails, throw it away and write another. Poems are cheap.